This is a reprint of a commentary in the Oklahoma Gazette Feb. 8. 2006 I thought it was Bloody Hilarious!

There’s no history like no history
By William W. Savage Jr.

It’s much ado about nothing, this flap over Senate Bill 982 and whether its passage last year by our state Legislature really means kids don’t have to take OK. History in high school if they plan on going to college
I don’t see that it matters one way or another. The public schools have been offering Oklahoma History for decades, and it’s usually taught by some guy whose first name is “Coach,” and the students learn doodly-squat.
How do I know? I’ve spent 30 years teaching college-level OK. History to students who supposedly took it in high school, and I can safely say they know what Coach taught ’em. Which is to say, nada, zippo, nihnl, nothing.

I’ve listened to the same sad commentary from my students semester after semester. For instance:
“Indian removal was just awful. How come I never heard of it?”
“I was born and raised in Okemah. They never said anything about Woody Guthrie in our school.”
“Dust Bowl? Depression? We didn’t cover that.” “Coach taught Oklahoma History. We watched a lot of game film”
” What we did at my school was memorize all the counties of OK. in alphabetical order. That was it. Took us half a year.”
“Coach taught Okla. history. He talked about Missouri all the time. He said it was because he didn’t know anything about Okla., and besides he was from Missouri.”
And if I had a dollar for every kid from Tulsa who never heard of the 1921 race riot, I could lose a young fortune scratching off lottery tickets. For the benefit of common education, ya know.
Most recently, there was this one: “My high school’s Okla. History book was written for students who read at the third-grade level. It said so, right in the front. Occasionally there were some two-syllable words in there, though.”

Fortunately for graduates of classes like that, “boomer” and “sooner” are two-syllable, and the only ones you need at certain athletic contests. Who cares if shouting “boomer” and “sooner” at somebody in 1889 could have gotten you killed? The past can be so inconvenient–and soooo messy. A “sooner” was a sorry sumbitch in 1889 but nobody needs to know it nowadays, especially in the Sooner State. We are after all, no one. Oops … I meant No. 1. And we sure want to keep it that way.

Maybe our children should learn about our heritage the way God intended: They should become tourists, and with all the other tourists gaze upon the scenic Oklahoma River, visit Heavener and discover Okla. vikings, and stand reverently at the Guthrie grave site of that great and mummified Oklahoman, Elmer McCurdy.

It’d be much better than school because I don’t think old Coach knows about any of that stuff either.

Savage is professor of history at the University of Oklahoma.

I much admit that I don’t know who Elmer McCurdy is either, Maybe he was a coach at Guthrie High. (JJ.)