Bud
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California When suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit,Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the
cowboy, “If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you Give me a calf?”
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, “Sure, why not?”
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Singular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe photo shop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg,
Germany.
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an
MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP Laser Jet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, “You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.”
“That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,” says Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then Bud says to the young man, “Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?”
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, “Okay, why not?”
“You’re a Congressman for the U.S. Government”, says Bud.
“Wow! That’s correct,” says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?”
“No guessing required.” answered the cowboy. “You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how
much smarter than me you are; and You don’t know a thing about how working people make a living -or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep.
….
Now give me back my dog.
February 22nd, 2010 at 5:16 pm
Yeah, Robo, I would say that about sums up what we have in Congress these days (and, probably future, past days as well)…… This reminds me of a question posed by Ford Fairlane, “Why have you come to my planet?”….. Those people live in an entirely different world than the rest of us (Who, by the way, elected them, pay their salary, and allow them to get away with things very similar to this)….. Okay, Okay, I’m going to give myself a “Boot to the Head” – These political Posts are killing me – I’m still trying to compose a reply comment to HS on my “President’s Day” Post….. Hold on, HS, It’s comin’, I just need to shorten it down from it’s original 1,100 page Sci-Fi fictional form presented to Congress in 1964…. It’s working title was “The Warren Commission Report”….. Someone stop me!….
PD Bob said I’ll “Smoke a turd in Hell for that one”, and to expect visits from agencies no one has ever heard of….. PDB also said he has knowledge of rumors that they are preparing a cell for one MR in Leavenworth – Free room and board for life…. PDB said that either I know too much or they think that I know too much, and, that’s more than I’m allowed…… He’s putting up rental signs as I compose this……
February 22nd, 2010 at 8:33 pm
MR this was not a political post it was a political joke. A political post would make you cry not make you laugh.
February 24th, 2010 at 8:35 pm
What’s that old saying?…. “I’m laughing on the outside, but, crying on the inside”…… Let’s just say, although funny, it was about as close to the truth as you can get concerning Washington…..